Or so it would appear.
My secret is I get incredibly stalled, maybe more often than not. I love running, but sometimes I cannot bring myself to get out of bed and out the door for a run in the morning. I love working with my clients but sometimes I get an inexplicable dread or anxiety before a session. I love writing, but sometimes days go by where I don't write a thing of importance, and then on top of it, I feel even worse because I know other writer friends are sitting this minute in some little coffee shop in the far reaches of Carroll Gardens, slaving away for hours over one paragraph of their novel or latest magazine article.
Like everyone else, these feelings on occasion coalesce into a darkness/dread that yields near-complete paralysis. I feel frustrated, like I am not going anywhere, or doing anything worthwhile with my life. I want to throw in the towel, talk myself out of the gym, cancel on a client, shut down my computer and just lie in bed reading.
Of course, 9 times out of 10, I do not give into this (admittedly powerful) existential crisis. Instead, here's how I conquer The Stall:
1) Procrastination. It's an amazing invention. I don't necessarily mean fill up an entire day with nonsense, but when I am feeling stalled, panicked, or blocked, doing something like emptying the dishwasher or throwing in a load of laundry actually helps clear my head.
2) Making a list. But I didn't say checking it. I find that just HAVING a list-knowing that today's to-do's, both big and small, are laid out in a neat way on paper-gives me a huge sense of peace. I know full well that I probably won't get to half the things on there, and they'll just be transferred to the next day, but somehow putting it all in writing ironically makes it all seem less daunting.
3) Exercise. Yes, I know it's my stock in trade, and like I said above, also one of my problems is sometimes just dreading getting out the door. But I cannot express enough how much a run or brisk walk or other strenuous or semi-strenuous activity gets both the blood and ideas flowing. I haven't worked out yet today, but instead of writing this blog in my pajamas, I am sitting in my workout clothes and in 38 minutes, at noon exactly, I am heading out the door.
4) Wallow. To all outer appearances, I am the most positive person on the planet. But when I am having "one of those days," I let the negativity swallow me. I sit and stare and pout and feel terror and dread and guilt over everything I am not doing and am not capable of doing. (Then I thank my lucky stars for everything I DO have, and move on).
5) Just do it, even something tiny. If, like me, you can't bear writing a new essay or designing a whole new boot camp class, send an email connecting with an old colleague. Think of a new story idea. Write down two blog ideas. Add one new ingredient to an old recipe.
I took my own advice today and just before writing this blog post, on a whim sent a story idea to an editor at a huge national newspaper that I haven't worked with yet. He immediately wrote back saying he loved my idea and asked some questions about how I would go about getting it done. Though that doesn't necessarily mean the story is a "go," it certainly made my day. And like that, the light takes over the darkness.
Leanne Shear is a writer, personal trainer, and low-key life coach. Her blog, "life coaching light, working out hard," can be found at http://leanneshear.com.
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